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You aren’t even going to believe this

So I know the entire world is wondering, “how did your son break his collar bone”? Well world it’s simple. He fell off his bed.

It was Thursday night about 12:40 am, so technically it was Friday, and I heard a loud “kuh- thu – thud”. He sleeps in a ball so that would have been him hitting the side table, causing it to roll into the door, then falling shoulder first into the hardwood floor. I raced (okay grudgingly walked in there) and comforted him. Checked his extremities and left. When I laid him back down he was fine. Don’t judge me for walking in there grudgingly. How was I suppose to know he was actually hurt? I was tired. I had worked, cleaned, and put the kids to bed that night. I was exhausted. I comforted him as any mother would.

At 1 am and I heard soft tears again. I knew something was wrong. Jr. LOVES his sleep. So I went back in there and tried to take off his shirt. I had to cut it off of him. Nothing caught my eye. I tried to raise his arm and the worst squeal/cry/scream came out of his mouth. Honestly Hollywood needs to track down this kid and record that noise. It was scary. I put a jacket on him (cause I knew putting a shirt on him would not end well) and took him into the Emergency Room. I promised him as long as he never made that noise again for the rest of the night, I would buy him a something from Sonic.

Bribery is key to parenting.

Well three hours later at the emergency room, we found out his collar bone was definitely broken. And your truly instagramed the whole process.

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I feel like this is my favorite shot. Like those Perry pajamas? He’s had them for over 2 years now. They are so old they have those little balls on them from being washed so much. These are the pajamas that could never disappear. But OOPS the shirt was cut, so now I get to throw them away.

He was such a trooper through the whole thing. All the doctors loved him. I think the x-ray tech may have had a crush on him. (Not literally, just in the sweet kind). She took him back there and show him his x-ray. He showed her where his spine was and when she asked where he learned this he promptly stated, “Mommy let’s me watch Bones with her”. Yep. My son watches Bones. Well after I screen the episode to make sure there’s low sexual content, they don’t watch things about rape.

Friday was a pain in the arse though. We tried seeing the local pediatric orthopedic here in the city, but for one he doesn’t take military insurance and two they wouldn’t approve it until our primary doctor approved it and she told us that she couldn’t see him until Monday. So I called our insurance company twice when I was told that they had “no legal obligation to help me” since he was my step son. Thank goodness my husband had the day off because he then called the insurance company four times. We were finally told that unless we called each individual base on the East Coast he wasn’t going to get to see a doctor until next week.

So we went to Bethesda, Maryland.

We don’t play around when it comes to our kids.

We got the a-okay on him. There is no surgery needed. And he should be healed within three weeks. On that note, I’ll leave you with this great closing pictures. Hey, he’s resourceful!

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